I didn't want to come home today. I really didn't. I'm tired of the fighting and chris's fit throwing and yelling and screaming and punishing and parenting. I didn't want to come home today. I wanted to run away and be no one's mom and no one's wife, just be me. There may be nothing more wrong with my child than he is just one angry confused child. Sometimes i want an escape. when we fight my husband gets to get mad and get up and leave, but not me. I own the majority of children in the house, i have to stay. No one will beg me to stay, beg me not to leave. I'm the one who is always here, i fight the hardest when things get hard, but he gets to walk away angry and mad and come back when he's ready. But if i walked out, no one would beg me to stay, no one would plead for me to come back, no one but the children. But i'm always begging, even when i do the less wrong, even when i'm right.